“From Jammu to Toronto: How One Unexpected Move Unlocked a Life We Never Dared to Dream”
The real immigrant story of surprises, sacrifice, and unstoppable grit
They say the biggest plot twists in life aren’t written by us. And looking back, I know that to be true. If someone had told me at age 23, standing in the chaos and calm of my wedding day in Jammu, that I would one day criss-cross Canadian skies weekly, raising two kids while re-qualifying as a dentist—I would’ve laughed. Or perhaps cried. Because the truth is, none of it was in the plan.
At 24, just a year into marriage, I packed my bags and left for Toronto. The reason? Not ambition. Not a big job offer. Just a simple post-graduate course—an escape route from the limited work opportunities in Jammu and the overwhelming, often thankless duties of a newly married daughter-in-law. There’s no roadmap handed to young brides in India, only expectations. You’re told what to do, not how to live.
Canada: The Land of Cold and Clarity
The first winter in Canada can break you. But that first year was full of humble milestones. My husband joined me in 2009, and in just two weeks, found a job. A year later, to our utter disbelief, we bought a home. Yes—a real house, with a mortgage, in Toronto, with just two years of Canadian life behind us. In India, such a thing felt unattainable for a young couple with modest income. There, homeownership feels like a dream reserved for those with generational wealth or high-income jobs in metros. Here, it was a surprising possibility—even a right—with planning and paperwork.
In 2011, our first child was born. And life moved into a new gear. Diapers, daycare, dinners. Like any other average Canadian family, we hustled.
But then… the discomfort crept in.
When Your Identity Feels Out of Sync
I had trained as a dentist in India. But here, I was a ghost in the profession—unlicensed, unrecognized. The idea of going back to dentistry in Canada looked like a mountaintop too far. Endless exams. Hundreds of thousands of dollars. Weekends and evenings stolen by books. Clinical training. Travel across cities just to sit for assessments. Meanwhile, a toddler needed me. A marriage needed tending. Meals had to be cooked. Emotions processed.
I questioned everything. And then… God laughed.
Surprise: A New Chapter in London, Ontario
My husband got into dental school in London, Ontario. The family plan changed again. New city. New routine. And a new thought: maybe it was time for a second baby. Maybe I could re-dream dentistry, too.
And so began the double hustle.
With two kids now, I launched into an equally intense journey: studying, traveling, surviving. Sometimes it felt like we were two trains running on parallel tracks—kids in tow—trying not to derail. I had no idea I would one day do something completely insane (yet so normal to me now): fly every single week from Timmins to Toronto, just to attend classes and practice. Friday mornings: takeoff. Friday nights: home again. Tired but triumphant. Because when you want something bad enough, geography bends.
Covid. Chaos. Clarity.
The world paused. Our plans didn’t. We moved cities again. My husband landed a great job in rural Ontario. We adjusted. We expanded. We endured.
At every step, life surprised us—not with big jackpots or overnight success, but with small wins that added up. A license. A job. A career restart. A home. A stable rhythm. And children who knew the meaning of watching both parents strive.
What They Don’t Tell You About Surprise
When people talk about “the element of surprise,” they usually mean luck. Or fate. But in truth, surprise is forged in the spaces between courage and commitment. It’s what happens when you take a leap not knowing if there’s a landing.
So often we overestimate what we can do in one year, and wildly underestimate what can happen in five. That’s what life taught me. In 2008, I was a bride with no clue how to restart a career. By 2017, we had a home, a baby, and one of us in dental school. By 2022, we were both back in our professions, with two kids and roots in Canada.
That’s not luck. That’s momentum. Built quietly. Daily.
But Why Are Our Lives So Different?
This haunts me still.
In the same time we rebuilt our lives from scratch, others stayed stuck. Brilliant friends in India remained at home, burdened with taking care of healthy but demanding middle-aged parents. Some peers chased opportunities in other countries, only to find themselves stuck in dead-end jobs. Others became billionaires by betting on the right stock, crypto, or startup.
Why is life so… uneven?
I don’t know the full answer. But here’s what I do know:
- Surprise doesn’t visit everyone equally—but it favors those who stay open to change.
- Responsibility is cultural—some of us carry family weight like cement. Others, like feathers.
- Timing is divine. And often, deeply unfair.
- Luck matters. But it only amplifies what you’re already doing. If you’re sitting idle, luck has no stage to perform on.
So What Can You Do?
Keep moving. Even when you don’t know where it’ll take you.
That’s what I did.
I didn’t move to Canada to “make it.” I moved because I needed space to breathe.
But in that space, I found a new self. One who can hustle. Raise kids. Show up. Fly in and out of cities for her dreams. Study at 10 PM while packing school lunches. And love, fiercely.
Surprise is not a moment. It’s a mindset.
Final Reflection: The Beauty of Unwritten Plans
If I could tell my 23-year-old self one thing, it would be this:
“Don’t worry about having it all figured out. The best parts of your story haven’t even been imagined yet.”
And to anyone feeling stuck in a life chapter that feels small or suffocating: take the leap. Even if it’s just one small course. One visa. One exam. One weekend away. That single act might open up a domino chain of events you didn’t even dare to plan.
The biggest surprise of life is not what you achieve—it’s realizing that you were always capable of it.
You just needed the right storm.